Archive for February 4th, 2011
10% Maintanence Plan
Posted by almuqarraboon in Reminders Profit Believers, Self-Development on February 4, 2011
Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2910; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 2327..
4. We spend a lot in Charity…Let’s maintain this Ibadah by making it a habit to spend for the cause of Allah…How about 10% of whatever you spent in Ramadan…
Allah ( subhanahu waTaala) said (in the closest meaning) “Those who spend their wealth in the Cause of Allaah, and do not follow up their gifts with reminders of their generosity or with injury, their reward is with their Lord. On them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve”
[al-Baqarah 2:261-262
It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah said: ‘Spend, O son of Adam, and I shall spend on you.’”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5073; Muslim, 993.
These are just some ideas I am sure everyone of us is doing more than that…
I ask Allah ( subhanahu wa Taala) to bless us all with the sincerity and give us Tawfeek to do what He loves and what pleases Him…..Ameen
Posted by almuqarraboon in Short and Inspiring Quotes on February 4, 2011
some of the Salaf mentioned:
Prohibition of Differences and Ikhtilaafaat
Posted by almuqarraboon in Imaan-boosters, Self-Development on February 4, 2011
by Shaykh ‘Abdullaah Ibn Abdur-Rahmaan Al-Jarboo (حفظه الله تعالى)
on Saturday, August 22nd, 2004
http://albaseerah.org/forum/showthread.php?t=5407
The Shaykh ‘Abdullaah Al-Jarboo (حفظه الله تعالى) is a learned scholar from Saudi Arabia, a professor at the Islaamic University in Madeenah Al-Munawwarah (الجامعة الإسلامية بالمدينة المنورة). Perhaps those of you who listen to ‘Ilm-Online have heard many of his lectures. May Allaah سبحانه وتعالى reward him tremendously for being with us today.
Introduction
The Shaykh ‘Abdullaah Al-Jarboo حفظه الله تعالى proceeded: In previous lessons we discussed that eemaan (الإيمان – faith) increases and decreases depending on each person. Mankind differs in the amount of eemaan which they possess. The level of one’s eemaan is determined by:
- What is in one’s heart i.e. what is in one’s heart from knowledge (علم – ’ilm), belief (اعتقاد – al-I’tiqaad) and love (محبة – mahabbah). One person may have more love for Allaah سبحانه وتعالى and His messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم than another, so the degree of love will be stronger from one individual to another. Similarly the belief will be more correct in one individual as compared to another, and one individual may have a stronger volition than another to choose what is good. All of these qualities are from the actions of the heart.
- One’s actions i.e. the actions of the individual in his commitment to performing good/righteous actions; e.g. when he does good actions such as prayer (الصلاة – salaah), fasting (الصوم – sawm) and pilgrimage (الحج – Hajj), and leaves off the bad ones.
- One’s speech i.e. one must engage in good speech and busy one’s tongue with reciting the Qur’aan, remembering Allaah سبحانه وتعالى, saying good things (الكلام الحسن – alkalaamul hasan) and other than that from the acts of obedience. All these things as well as leaving off ill sayings will increase one’s eemaan.
THE PEOPLE ARE IN ONE OF THREE LEVELS BASED ON THEIR EEMAAN
The Muslims therefore vary in their eemaan (الإيمان) and the portion of it which each individual possess. For some it is high whilst for others it is lower. As has been previously mentioned, when consideration is given to the level of good deeds which one performs, then there are three (3) levels. Allaah سبحانه وتعالى has mentioned in Qur’aan:
{We gave the Book (the Qur’aan) as inheritance to such of Our slaves whom We chose (the followers of Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم). Then of them are some who wrong their own selves, and of them are some who follow a middle course, and of them are some who are, by Allaah’s Leave, foremost in good deeds…} [Faatir/al-Malaaikah 35:32]
These levels are in accordance with their difference in perfection of the branches of eemaan with knowledge and action.
- First Level – Those who are oppressive to themselves
As for the first level then he is oppressive to himself (ظالم لنفسه). He is the one who entered Islaam in a good manner, understood Tawheed (belief in the oneness of Allaah), fulfilled the salaah (prayer) etc. but then after that, he started to mix the good actions with the bad actions and we know who they are and the nature of their eemaan and their endings i.e. what they will get in this life, what they will have in their grave after death and what they will get on Yawmul Qiyaamah (the Day of Judgement) depending on their actions.
- Second Level – Those in the middle
As for the second level then he is al-muqtasid (المقتصد). He is the one who sort of stays in the middle. Such a person also entered into Islaam, understood Tawheed, did acts of obedience which Allaah سبحانه وتعالى made obligatory upon him and desisted from the prohibitions which Allaah سبحانه وتعالى prohibited. If he fell into anything from sin and major sins he repented quickly. However, he also fell short in some of the liked actions and he indulged in some of the disliked acts and he engaged himself plentifully in the allowable acts (i.e. there is no haraam in them). As for the muqtasid, we know who they are, the nature of their eemaan and also the portion of their reward in this world and the hereafter.
—
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The Fundamentals of Happiness
Posted by almuqarraboon in Heart and Soul, Reminders Profit Believers on February 4, 2011
The Fundamentals of Happiness
- Know that if you do not live within the scope of today, your thoughts will be scattered, your affairs will become confused, and your worrying will increase- theses realities explain the hadith:
“When you are in the morning, do not except to see the evening, and when you are in the evening, do not except to see the morning.”
- Forget the past and all that it contained. Being absorbed in things that are one is sheer lunacy.
- Do not be preoccupied with the future. Because the future is in the world of the unseen, do not let it bother you until it comes.
- Do not be shaken by criticism; instead, be firm. And know that, in proportion to your worth, the level of people’s criticism rises.
- Faith in Allah and good deeds: these are ingredients that make up a good and happy life.
- Whoever desires peace, tranquility, and comfort can find it all in the remembrance Allah.
- You should know with certainly that everything that happens occurs in accordance with a divine decree.
- Do not expect gratitude from anyone.
- Train yourself to be ready and prepared for the worst eventuality.
- Perhaps what has happened is in your best interest ( though you may not comprehend how that is so)
- Everything that is decreed for the Muslim is best for him.
- Enumerate the blessing of Allah be thankful for them.
- You are better off than many others
- Relief comes for one hour to the next.
- In both times of hardship and ease, one should turn to supplication and prayer
- Calamities should strengthen your heart and reshape your outlook in a positive sense
- Indeed, with each difficulty there is relief.
- Do not let trifles be the cause of your destruction
- Indeed, your Lord is Often Forgiving.
- Do not be angry…Do not be angry.. Do not be angry.
- Life is bread, water, and shade; so don not be perturbed by a lack of any other material things.
- Most evil that is supposed to happen never occurs.
- Look at those who are afflicted and be thankful
- When Allah loves a people, He makes them endure trials.
- You should constantly repeat those supplications that the Prophet taught us to say during times of hardship.
- Work hard at something that is productive, and cast off idleness.
- Don’t spread rumors and don’t listen to them. If you hear a rumor inadvertently, then don’t believe it.
- Your malice and your striving to seek revenge are much more harmful to your health than they are to your antagonist.
- The hardship that befall you atone for your sins.
- And always be forgivining.
- Do not be harshful on weak people and always hear your brother or sister excuses.
- Do not be an active of accusation but be a vicitim.
- Do what you want to do and not listen to the ones that want to destroy you
Will post the source soon* inshaa’Allah
“Verily one of you behaves like the people of Paradise…”
Posted by almuqarraboon in Heart and Soul on February 4, 2011
Shaykh Muhammad al-Maliki
Question: The first question for today’s session is posted by brother DkSadiq and his question is: The forty Hadeeth in An-Nawawi says: “By Allaah, other than Whom there is no god, verily one of you behaves like the people of Paradise until there is but an arm’s length between him and it, and that which has been written overtakes him and so he behaves like the people of the Hellfire and thus he enters it…”[1] So, how do we avoid such destruction and how do we make sure that we stay and become firm upon the straight path until we die on it?
Answer: The Shaykh حفظه الله began by praising Allaah and sending salaah and salaam upon His Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم and his family and Companions and all those who follow His Sunnah and are guided until the Day of Judgment. He then proceeded:
Firstly, I would like to take this opportunity to thank our brother Zahid Rashid, Jazaahullaahu khayran for all that he prepares himself to do for the benefit of the Da’wah, which is the Da’wah of the Prophets and Messengers عليهم السلام. Secondly, I would also like to take this opportunity to thank Albaseerah.org for what they do in conveying the message ad-Da’wah as-Salafiyyah to the whole world. Jazakum Allaahu khayran. Then, I would also like to thank all those who participate in these sessions and make themselves available to listen to people that they trust, either the Ulamaa’ like Shaykh Zahid is coordinating with, or the Tullaabul-‘Ilm (Students of Knowledge) or people like myself who are even less (in status) than Tullaabul-‘Ilm – who are just brothers trying to deliver something of what the Ulamaa’ have said in this aspect. May Allaah gather us all again on the Day of Resurrection and with our Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم by his lake and make us from those who drink from it, gain his intercession and accompany him in the Jannah. Aameen.
This first question with which the Shaykh Zahid opened the session with is a very, very important hadeeth that many times made me think of the end of one of us, as this is already written in the Preserved Book – those people of the Jannah and those people of the Fire. From which ones are we going to be? We never lose hope in Allaah تعالى that He would make us from those people of the Jannah and make us avoid the causes of going to the Fire.
This hadeeth, the hadeeth of Ibn Mas’ood رضي الله تعالى عنه where the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said: “By the One, other than Whom there is no god, verily one of you performs the actions of the people of Paradise until there is but an arms length between him and it, and that which has been written overtakes him, and so he acts with the actions of the people of the Hellfire and thus enters it.”[1] This hadeeth, dear brothers and sisters, prevented many eyes of those pious people from sleep, because how can one sleep if he is like (the one in) this hadeeth – people who behave like the people of Paradise, and end their lives by behaving like those of the Fire. Who then can guarantee his end? Allaahul-musta’aan (Allaah is the Source of Help).
In another narration of this hadeeth the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم clarified this and said “A man may do what seem to the people as the deeds of the dwellers of Paradise but he is from the dwellers of the Hell-Fire”[2] Allaahul-musta’aan. It means that this person is upon hypocrisy – he shows the opposite of what he hides in his heart. He shows tawheed but he hides shirk, he shows the Sunnah but he hides bid’ah (innovation in the Religion) like those who Allaah تعالى mentioned in the beginning of Suratul-Baqarah about the Munaafiqoon (hypocrites) where Allaah سبحانه وتعالى says:
When they meet the believers they say “We believe”, look at how much this quality is seen today in the Muslim world. And, when they meet the Kuffaar and the Shayateen they say “We were just mocking them – these Wahaabees, these Salafees” and they start mocking the people of haqq (those upon the truth); but what is seen from them by the people, is that they seem Mashaa’ Allaah to be upon the haqq.
The hadeeth is explained by the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم himself in other narrations where he صلى الله عليه وسلم clarifies this by saying: “What the people see is that one acts upon the way of the people of Paradise (the Believers), but in reality he is not from them.”[3] This is like those hypocrites at the time of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. ‘Abdullaah ibn ‘Ubay ibn Salool, the head of the hypocrites at the time of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم used to pray behind the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and stand after the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم finished the salaah. He used to stand and give reminders to the Sahaabah, to Abu Bakr and `Umar, Subhaanallaah (Glory be to Allaah; He is free from any imperfection). He said “O people, obey Allaah, obey His Prophet, His Messenger” but with evil inside as he hated Allaah, he hated the Prophet and he hated the Believers; he was a munaafiq (hypocrite). That is why Allaah تعالى never keeps it hidden until the Day of Resurrection, as in the hadeeth – “until there is but an arm’s length”[1]. Look at this, Subhaanallaah, an arm’s length; it is nothing when you consider the distance between you and the grave, not the Fire, the grave, it is nothing; so what about to the Fire? They cannot persist and continue doing what they used to do to be seen of others, they will return to their (Originer? – word unclear) and become hypocrites. I seek refuge with Allaah from becoming Kuffaar.
So the question posed is, how do we avoid such destruction and how do we make sure that we stay and become firm upon the straight path until we die on it? That is simple Akhi (my brother), although it is something big, it is simple. Allaah won’t make it difficult for us. Allaah تعالى says:
Be honest in what you say, be honest in your belief, be honest in all your relations and dealings. Always look to the Sunnah of Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم in your belief, in your way of worship, in your transactions and contracts. Always take Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم as your example for everything in life. Besides that, purify your heart from hatred towards Muslims, from hatred towards worship, from love of the Kuffaar, from love of this life, just as the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم did and said to all of us. Always try to do as much as you can of the nawaafil (optional acts). Look at the hadeeth Qudsi which can be the remedy of this kind of illness, where Allaah تعالى says: “The most loved deeds to Me with which a servant of mine draws near to Me are those religious duties I have enjoined upon him. And he continues to draw near to Me with supererogatory deeds to the point where I love him.”[4]
So one draws close to Allaah by doing all the obligatory acts of worship, and then gets closer to Allaah by doing the optional acts of worship. What are the optional acts of worship? Fasting which we don’t know except in Ramadaan, sadaqah or charity which we don’t know except after one complete year, prayers that we don’t know except five times a day, supplications which we don’t know except if we are in trouble, things we mention that we never remember except on occasions like ‘Eed or weddings or like that. We don’t remember these optional forms of worship except when we are going into the grave (being buried). We ignore these forms of worship when are optional; we don’t know when they should occur. We know of them when they are obligatory, but we ignore them when they are optional. Take one example: In the hadeeth Qudsi Allaah تعالى says: “O my slave,, I fell ill and you did not visit me.” He will say: “O Lord and how should I visit You when You are the Lord of the worlds?” Allaah will say: “Did you not know that my servant so and so had fallen ill and you visited him not? Did you not know that had you visited him you would have found Me with him?”[5]
Subhaanallaah! Subhaanallaah! There are many acts of worship which we can do during the days and at nights. Where are we regarding the dhikr, the remembrance – the tasbeeh (glorifying Allaah) and the istighfaar (seeking forgiveness from Allaah).
So, where are we regarding this form of worship? Where are we concerning the advice that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم gave to Sufyaan: “Always keep your tongue moistened with the remembrance of Allaah”?[6] Where are we concerning this, meaning that it may be a protection from falling into the deeds, actions, sayings, beliefs and faults of the hypocrites and the kuffaar. We can only protect ourselves by becoming closer to Allaah, by means which bring us closer to Allaah.
This is my answer to the question which in reality needs a complete lecture to clarify and expand upon it; because I see that most of the people in this time are upon these types of diseases and illnesses. May Allaah تعالى protect us from that, and keep us upon the straight path until we stand before Him سبحانه وتعالى gaining His Pleasure; and Allaah knows best.
Answered by: Shaykh Muhammad al-Maliki
Title of Lecture: Question and Answer Session
Date of the Lecture: November 3rd, 2007
Listen to Lecture: Click Here
Read the Transcribed Lecture: Click Here
[1] Reported in Saheeh al-Bukhaaree, The Book of Tawheed (Belief), (كتاب التوحيد), Hadeeth (#7016). Also reported other places in Saheeh al-Bukhaaree and Saheeh Muslim.
[2] Reported in Saheeh al-Bukhaaree, The Book of Military Campaigns (كتاب المغازي), Hadeeth (#3966, 3970) as part of a longer hadeeth.
[3] Reported with the following wording in Saheeh al-Bukhaaree, The Book of Heart Softening Narrations (كتاب الرقاق), Hadeeth (#6137).
[4] Reported in Saheeh Muslim with the following wording as part of a longer hadeeth in The Book of Righteousness, Joining the Ties of Kinship and Manners, Hadeeth (#2569).
[5] Reported in Jaami` at-Tirmidhee 5/458, Hadeeth (#3375). Shaykh al-Albaanee رحمه الله says with a Saheeh isnaad. See also Saheeh al-Jaami` as-Sagheer, Hadeeth (#7700).
[6] Reported in Jaami’ at-Tirmidhee 5/458, Hadeeth (#3375). Shaykh al-Albaanee رحمه الله says with a Saheeh isnaad. See also Saheeh al-Jaami’ as-Sagheer, Hadeeth (#7700).
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Was the Prophet s.a.w. made of Noor?
Posted by almuqarraboon in Back 2 the Basics :), Muhammad (saws) on February 4, 2011
Was the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) noor (light) or bashar (a human being)? Was Prophet Muhammad a “Noor” or “Bashar”, and is it true that he had no shade even in light?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Our Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is the leader of all the sons of Adam, and he is a human being, one of the sons of Adam. He was born from two parents, he ate food and married woman, he got hungry and fell sick, and he felt joy and sorrow. One of the clearest signs of his humanity is that Allaah caused him to die as He causes all souls to die, but what distinguishes the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) from others is Prophethood and Revelation.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Say (O Muhammad): I am only a man like you. It has been revealed to me that your Ilaah (God) is One Ilaah (God i.e. Allaah)”
[al-Kahf 18:110]
The state of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in his humanity is the same as that of all the Prophets and Messengers. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And We did not create them (the Messengers, with) bodies that ate not food, nor were they immortals”
[al-Anbiya’ 21:8]
Allaah condemned those who wondered at the humanity of the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), as He says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And they say: Why does this Messenger (Muhammad) eat food, and walk about in the markets (as we)…?”
[al-Furqaan 25:8]
It is not permissible to overstep the mark with regard to what the Qur’aan states about the message and humanity of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). For example, it is not permissible to describe him (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) as being noor (light) or as casting no shadow, or to say that he was created from light.
Rather this is a kind of exaggeration which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade when he said: “Do not exaggerate about me as was exaggerated about ‘Eesa ibn Maryam. Say: the slave of Allaah and His Messenger.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6830.
Moreover it is proven that the angels are the ones who were created from light, not any of the sons of Adam. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The angels were created from light, and Iblees was created from smokeless fire, and Adam (peace be upon him) was created from what has been described to you.” Narrated by Muslim, 2996.
Shaykh al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah (458):
This indicates that the well known hadeeth that is in circulation among people – “The first thing that Allaah created was the light of your Prophet, O Jaabir” – is false, and so are other similar ahaadeeth which say that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was created from light. This hadeeth clearly indicates that the angels are the only ones who are created from light, not Adam and his sons, so pay heed and do not be negligent. End quote.
The Standing Committee for Issuing Fatwas was asked the following question:
Here in Pakistan the scholars of the Bareilawi sect believe that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cast no shadow, which indicates that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was not human. Is this hadeeth saheeh which says that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) had no shadow?
They replied:
This view is false and goes against the texts of the Qur’aan and the saheeh Sunnah which indicate that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was human and did not differ in his human make-up from other people. He had a shadow like any other human.
The Prophethood with which Allaah honoured him did not alter the fact that he was human as Allaah created him, with a father and mother. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Say (O Muhammad): I am only a man like you. It has been revealed to me that your Ilaah (God) is One Ilaah (God ___i.e. Allaah)”
[al-Kahf 18:110]
“Their Messengers said to them: We are no more than human beings like you”
[Ibraaheem 14:11]
With regard to the report that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was created from the light of Allaah, this is a fabricated hadeeth.
End quote.
Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah, 1/464
Islam Q&A
Will Those from the 72 Misguided Sects Remain in the Hellfire Forever?
Posted by almuqarraboon in Innovations on February 4, 2011
| Will Those from the 72 Misguided Sects Remain in the Hellfire Forever? – Shaykh Fahad Ibn Sulaymaan Al-Fuhayd | Oct 12, ’10 8:21 AM for everyone |
Question: Regarding the hadeeth of the saved sect, ‘all in the hellfire except one’[1], will those from the other 72 sects ever come out of the Hellfire or will they reside in the Hell forever so that they may be called kuffaar (Disbelievers), or will they come out of it after some time?
Answer: This question has 2 parts. The first part is that it is apparent that the questioner has misunderstood and has made a mistake pertaining to a very important matter. He has assumed that whoever was threatened by the Fire is a Kaafir (Disbeliever) or that the ruling of kufr (disbelief) is applicable to him; this is a big mistake. This is a big mistake because Allaah سبحانه وتعالى may have threatened them with the Fire due to their disobedience and not due to their being from the Disbelievers.
No doubt, the Disbelievers will abide in the Fire. Those disobedient to Allaah سبحانه وتعالى, for example the one who eats ribaa (usury) and the one who is undutiful to his parents and the likes of this; they are threatened with the punishment of the Fire. However, they are under the Will of Allaah سبحانه وتعالى which is the ‘Aqeedah (Creed) of Ahlus Sunnah wal-Jamaa’ah. If they are punished in the Fire they will not remain there forever because they are from the People of Tawheed.
As for the second part of this question, as it relates to statements of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم concerning the deviant sects “all of them in the fire except one.”[1] Firstly, ‘all of them in the fire’ (meaning the rest of the groups), does not mean that they are all Disbelievers, as previously mentioned.
Secondly, the meaning of this hadeeth is that whoever goes against the manhaj (methodology) of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and his Companions falls into following one of these deviant groups. So he is a sinner, committing a sin and great disobedience (to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم) and is subject to punishment in the Fire.
Thirdly, from the People of Knowledge who are firm on this Deen from the `Ulamaa’ of Ahlus Sunnah wal-Jamaa’ah, is that from amongst the misguided groups are:
- those who are wrong or make mistakes
- those who disobeyed
- those who commit sins (faasiq)
- those who disbelieve e.g. they fall into extreme innovation, the likes of the extremists among the Raafidah, and the Jahmiyyah who deny the attributes of Allaah سبحانه وتعالى
- the atheists
- the hypocrite who acts upon disobedience
- the ignorant people who make mistakes;
These deviant groups are not on the same level; rather they are on different levels.
From another angle, Ahlus Sunnah wal-Jamaa’ah believes that if an individual (not the group) errs and goes against the manhaj of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and the Sahaabah, there are conditions which must be satisfied before he may be considered a disbeliever i.e. the conditions (which necessitate the ruling of takfeer) must be present altogether and the obstacles (which prevent the ruling of takfeer) must be negated. Then, the ruling of disbelief may be considered if the individual makes a statement of disbelief or if he is upon an aqeedah of disbelief.
We differentiate between the statement which is possibly a statement of disbelief and between the one who made the statement. So they generalize by saying that “someone who makes a statement of disbelief is generally considered a disbeliever”.
As for takfeer of a specific individual, then they are required to examine his condition i.e. the conditions (which necessitate the ruling of takfeer) must be present altogether and the obstacles (which prevent the ruling of takfeer) must be negated.
This is the answer by and large, therefore it is not correct to generalize the pronouncement of disbelief on these Muslim groups that they are all in the Fire. Rather, Allaah سبحانه وتعالى has commanded us to be just and the likes of this. Indeed, regarding the ruling of a specific individual being in the Fire, his affair is only with Allaah سبحانه وتعالى. Inshaa Allaah this is beneficial to our brother the questioner.
Answered by: Shaykh Fahad Ibn Sulaymaan Al-Fuhayd
Title of Lecture: UIK Educational Seminar
Date of the Lecture: Saturday, September 16, 2006
Listen to Lecture: Click Here
Read the Transcribed Lecture: Click Here
[1] Reported in Sunan Ibn Maajah 2/1322 (#3993), Shaykh Al-Albaanee رحمه الله says Saheeh in Saheeh al-Jaami` (#2042)
Tips: How to Treat Our Mothers
Posted by almuqarraboon in For the Family, Parents, Reminders Profit Believers on February 4, 2011
Tips on How to Treat Our MothersAnd We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years give thanks to Me and to your parents, unto Me is the final destination. [Noble Quran 31:14] They carried us in their wombs for nine months, then endured the pain of labor, and then nurtured us and did everything for us when we were helpless babies and children; they bear the teenage years with patience and advice. We hope this compilation of ways on how to treat our mothers will put a smile on the faces of your mothers, and let them know we have not forgotten what they go through. A smile with a warm embrace. Saying thanks often. An offer to wash up the dishes. A cup of tea without her asking. Recite her favorite Surah, Tidy round after she goes to bed, so that when she wakes up the house is tidy. Buy her little ornaments for round the house so when she sees them she remembers you. Rub her feet (after all, that’s where Paradise is). Phone your mum just to tell her you love her. Buy her surprise gifts. Go to her when she calls you. Write a poem for her. If you’re on the phone, and your mother is asking something tell the person to wait. Cook for her. Let her teach you to cook even if you know, she will enjoy the fact that you’re coming to her to ask. Bring your wife to her to learn how to cook, she will enjoy teaching her your favorite recipes, and both of you praise her cooking. Clean the house without your mum having to ask. Tell her how happy you are that she is a part of your life and your own families. Always take your mothers side in front of your wife and mother over differing opinions; you can appease your wife later on out of sight. Give her money to treat herself. Make breakfast for her. Go to get the shopping for her. If your mother likes to get the shopping, in then be patient with her as she goes up and down the aisles. Do your own washing and ironing. Spread the salaam when you leave and return from the home. Comb her hair. Massage her shoulders. Do well in school Pray all your prayers on time Help with your younger siblings so she can put her feet up. Teach your younger siblings to also help around the house, a mother needs time for her Ibadah too; her Ibadah should not have to fit around housework all the time. Look good and smell nice and be polite so that you’re a good example of her upbringing. Don’t always have your mum waking you up for prayer; try to wake her up instead. Help her with new technology, this stimulates her brain and keeps her mentally fit. Take an interest in her hobbies. If its sewing making sure she has all the things she needs. Ooo and ahhh, at her creations. Listen to lectures together; watch programs together this is what makes the bond stronger between you. Take the bins out and remember to bring them in, once they are emptied, this chore is something Muslim mums don’t like as they have to cover them selves all up to take it out. If affordable, try to buy her the best and freshest food at the supermarket Take her out for drives in the car, especially if you live in the city take her to the countryside, go with the whole family and take a picnic. When you drive make sure you remember that there is a fragile vessel beside you, who would like to see what’s out of the window rather than a blur because you’re speeding. No white knuckle rides please. Ask your mother about her youth, most mothers love recalling their past Be good to her relatives and her friends Name some of your children after her side of the family, as a lot of the time it’s the dad who chooses her children’s names. Have a good relationship with your brothers and sisters; there is nothing more worrying to a mother than seeing her children at odds with one another. Never raise your voice or speak in a harsh tone to your mother. Tell her regularly what’s going on in your life, don’t let her hear your news from others. Seek her opinion in all major decisions, she has been there and done that. Always thank and praise her for the good job she has done over the years. Kiss her when you go and come from the house. Make Du’a for her Always ask her to make Du’a for you and your family, this brings her closer to your family. Ring your mother if you’re going to be late getting home. Try not to stay out too late, as she will not sleep till you’re safely inside. Be patient when she is not feeling well, bring her all she needs, and go with her to the doctors so she has support. Remind your mother to be a good Muslimah , and tell her heart softening stories and about paradise and hell. Read to her Islamic books What ever you learned in a gathering or class, share it with her. Remind her to read Surah al-Kahf on Fridays Take her to the mosque if she wishes to go. Make sure she has contact with other good sisters who will increase her Iman. Take her to her friends yourself or arrange transport. Invite her to your house at the weekend. Take cooked food to her, to give her a rest. Encourage her to do the Sunnah fasts, and then break fast with each other. Know what makes your mother smile and do it often. Be an active and a productive member of society. Mothers are happy when they see this. Buy your mum flowers, the smell and prettiness of flowers do wonders. Lead your mother and family in the Salah. Get married and choose a spouse who your mother approves of. Choose a wife who is soft hearted and will treat your mother well. Don’t put off jobs that need done around the house. Remind her always of the traps of the Shaytan, remind her to do her daily Adkhars. Choose your own friends wisely. Pay for her to do Hajj and Umrah and go with her. Don’t remind her of how much you spent on her. Look after her health, reminding her of the benefits of a good diet and some exercise. Always ask your mums advice about your own household, this makes her happy and lets her know you value her opinion. If there is any problem with your wife and mother, then never carry tales saying what the other said as most of that is done in anger. Read Ruqya Ayat over water and give her it to drink. Buy her beauty products, and perfumes. Be there when there is any lifting to be done. Let her listen and correct your mistakes, when you’re memorizing Quran. Always intervene in any disputes between your parents calmly. Give her some money from your salary every month, so she can save for something she wants to buy, or to give in charity. Lay your head in each others lap, you might be 12 or 40 but in your mothers eyes you’re still her child. Give charity on her behalf regularly. Give charity on behalf of her deceased relatives. Buy her gold, women like it and it’s an investment. Listen to her complaints with understanding, and give her solutions that she can imply to make her life better. Walk at her pace with her on the inside protected from the road. If she wants to share what’s in her glass with you, drink from the same side she drank from. Just like children who need quality time, give this to your mother also. Serve her first with the food. When you give her a drink, wait till she has finished then take away her glass. Use affectionate terms for her and other motherly terms of affection. When you see her doing something wrong, even in that disobedience treat her gently and with the upmost respect. Always open the door for her. Try to always speak in her mother tongue, and if your not then translate word for word, so she does not feel left out. Remind her of the rights Islam has bestowed on the mother, and tell her good stories of how others treat their mothers. Never cut your mother off when she is speaking, and be patient when she cuts you off. Sit at her feet and listen to what she is saying. Make her a large part of your grandchildren’s lives; always bring them over to visit. Teach your own children to respect their grandparents as well. If you are in a class and you are unsure as to why mum is calling then leave the class to answer the call.’ When you’re angry with each other, don’t leave the house, and don’t refuse her food, or any attempts your mother makes to make amends, try to be the first one to defuse the situation. Always knock on her bedroom door before entering Don’t enter into debates that you know will irritate each other, especially in the morning and at night. |
| Khadejah Jones Share Islam Team ShareIslam.com |
Al Muqarraboon 