I went out with a group of friends yesterday. We went to an aquarium and marveled over the creation of Allah swt. How intricate and delicate and colorful and beautiful, subhanAllah! I had one of the best imaan-boosting experiences ever just bending down close to the tanks and studying each fish closely, looking at their gills and their skin and the way they moved.
While I was there, however, I felt eyes on me a few times, and no, it wasn’t the fish. (lol) It was the other visitors of the aquarium. Some had come in groups, some with their children. They must have found it quite a sight to see a niqabi. “Forget the fish — look! It’s a ninja!” I always laugh a little to myself, and think “wow, I’m really not that interesting.”
I became aware of their eyes on me a few times, and then I would immediately be distracted by the beautiful sights in front of me and the company of sisters around me. My policy is to let these things slide off my shoulders and to never let it dwell in my mind. While there, I did not give it much thought, but afterwards, I reflected on it a bit.
I came to a realization within myself… No one has the right to make me feel as if I am an outsider. This earth belongs to my Lord, not to you. And I am welcome on this earth, just as you are. And He provides for me, and He provides for you, so don’t think for a second that you will make me feel ashamed of doing something to get closer to Him. Your gaze on me is temporary, while His gaze on me is permanent. I will choose Allah over you, any day.
This is a reminder for myself and for all of the sisters out there: Don’t ever let a disobedient slave make you feel ashamed of your obedience to the Master.