We’ve all been through those phases where we just can’t seem to memorize. It’s like there is something physically pulling us back. We know it’s irrational and we know it is wrong, but we can’t get out of it; it just keeps happening. Something interesting that people don’t really talk about when it comes to these moments, is that one of the most difficult parts about being in one of these moments is fully recognizing that you have a problem. The reason this part is the most difficult is because a lot of times, instead of “I have a serious problem,” this is what goes through our mind:
I’m just really busy right now, as soon as I find an open slot of time, I am going to get back on track.
I can’t start memorizing until I find a teacher, but I can’t just go and find a teacher and then be a disappointing student. So I better wait until I’m good and free, and then I’ll devote all of my time to memorizing.
It’s really not that big of a deal if I skip a day or two, I obviously have every intention of returning to it. And I can make up for this time — I’ll just pick up the pace when I’m more free, maybe during summer vacation.
These are the thoughts that fleet through our mind, sometimes without us even paying conscious attention to them.
You see a pattern right?
And who does this sound like? This the dialogue of none other than shaytan… Did you know he was leading you on?
All of these excuses sound really good, really legit. Even if you were to say them out loud, to another person, I doubt that they would argue with you on these points — except for the ones who are very clever and sincere, because they’ll see your flowery excuse for what it really is — an excuse.
One thing you have to tell yourself right now: your lack of time is not an excuse. It is not an excuse. You are the one who makes it an excuse. You are the one who labels things as “important” and “unimportant” in your life, and you’re the one who portions out your time amongst them. You know full well that if you really wanted, you could easily make time (dare I say it, at least an hour, if not more) to memorize Qur’an during your day.
Rather, what has actually happened is that this goal of memorizing the Qur’an has become something that no longer excites you as much as it used to. What has actually happened is that, even though you don’t want to admit it to yourself, you’ve subconsciously labeled it as “unimportant,” and your actions are a proof of this.
The question now is: why is this happening? You may find articles devoted to this phenomenon, but no one really mentions the reason. I’ve heard things like tiredness, laziness, busy-ness, stress, and more. For some reason, they don’t see that this and all of the other excuses are stemming from a very basic root: This is happening to you because your Imaan is going through a period of weakness.
I can already hear the clamor going on after I’ve made that statement. Arguments are erupting, trying to challenge it. But take a deep breath, step back and give it some sincere thought. Is it possible that what I’ve said is true?
I hope that you will also see, what I have seen, and that all of these other excuses will eventually boil down to the true reason: weak imaan.
For those of us who can remember a time when our imaan was high, we will remember that at that point, all we could think about was how to get closer to Allah swt, how to please Him swt. We weren’t thinking about sleep, or food, or other people, or this dunyah. We were utterly consumed with thoughts of the aakhira, and of our Meeting with Allah. At that point, you felt unstoppable, and the farthest things from your mind were excuses. Do you remember ever feeling like this?
This is why I made that bold statement.
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And finally…. do you want to hear something so amazing about all of this? The cure for your illness is in the very thing that you are avoiding.
The cure for weak imaan is in the Qur’an, reading it, reflecting upon it, and memorizing it.
Even the very process of sitting alone, with nothing but the Qur’an, reading the meanings, repeating ayaat and knowing that they’ve now entered your heart, will bring an indescribable calmness and tranquility upon you. At the end of it, you will make every intention to do this every single day, and to never skip over it, no matter what… And that is precisely when shaytan will come to you with his whispers again, so be ready this time.
So stop waiting for that perfect time or that perfect situation. Now is the perfect time; rush towards your cure.
And Allah Knows Best